A war cry

On Christmas day we got a surprise visit from the Blancatrix. She brought us some lovely really fresh fruit and some sorbet. About half a teaspoon per chimp, but better than nothing. Some more hand me down clothes for Melba (there's progress here). And a few dumb toys for all of us, as if all we can do is throw a doggie ball around. Still I was amazed. Could it be that she has feelings? Feelings for us? It'd never crossed my mind.

Another thing. Xelsior has been watching movies on hulu and the like, things like Rambo and Hulk. I suspect he thinks they're real. That they're real people doing real stuff. Cute. He came to me all excited and told me and Stellar.
- I got it. For Lil Jack. We gotta fight our way out of this place and find his mother. It's that simple. With a few hand grenades and automatic weapons, we can do it.
Stellar and I didn't even have to say anything, like, uh, where would we get the grenades and weapons? Still we looked at each other. We looked at Xelsior pretending to shoot through the walls. We looked at Melba trying on her new dress up clothes. At Lil Jack sucking his thumb in a corner with a forelorn look in his eyes.
- He's got a point, said Stellar.
I nodded. More later. OO-oo-aa-aa, oo-oo-aa-aa. A war cry.

Byerk. It's Xmas Eve

Hello, out there, this is Chimp-ion talking. I am not in a good mood. I am in fact in a filthy mood. So filthy that I am not even putting a picture up. I've been putting up all these pretty pictures, and what do I get in return? Nothing. In fact you need to send me a picture for a change and I'll post it. Get it?

Anyway. Everybody's been soooo excited about Christmas around here. I'm talking about the animals in the white coast, not us noble creatures. Uh-hum. We're not looking forward to it, because it means minimum staff, minimum attention, minimum food which is even less fresh than usual. I'm planning on retiring to a corner as we speak, and nobody bother me, OK? AAA-OOOOOO-AAAAA-OOO. Checking out.

A very angry Xelsior

This is not a picture of Xelsior this morning, OK, I repeat, not Xelsior!

Hum. Was Xelsior angry with me this morning. I thought maybe he would not realize I had unburdened Lil Jack on him, but if he's not a genius (that's me) he's not as dumb as I think him to be. He came all puffing steam at me:
- Hey, what did you think you were doing, having Lil Jack sleep with me? I didn't sleep a wink! I'm going to knock you out and you're going to sleep for a long long time.
Two things about Xelsior. Which prove that it was not a wise choice. He really really hates to be woken up, sleep is his thing, he says sleeping is the best part of his day. And when he gets mad he scratches and he bites and he's big, way bigger than me, even if we're about the same age. I tried to calm him down while jumping around to avoid his punches:
- Ok, ok, I didn't know. Sorry. We need to find a solution. Calm down now. Let's talk. Use words. Melba, Stellar, help! Heeeelp!
Finally, Melba and Stellar who were playing some kind of game in the corner came to my rescue. Stellar spoke first.
- We need to find a solution for Lil Jack.
- Well, yeah, I said, you haven't had him yet, I think it's your turn, Stellar.
She replied, very cool like, she can be really annoying.
- Try to be a bit more mature, Chimp-ion. We have a problem with Lil Jack and we need to solve it. Anybody has ideas?
- We could have him drink beer before he goes to sleep. That'll keep him quiet.
- Brilliant, Chimp-ion, brilliant. We're friends with Lil Jack, right? We like him?
We all had to agree we did like Lil Jack.
- The solution seems really simple to me. We need to find his Mom, added Stellar.
We were speechless.

Happinessss! SSSleep!!

Happiness. After four night of being kept awake by Mr. Lil jack, I have managed to unload the small adorable baby onto Xelsior. Tried the same trick Melba did on me: he's sooo cute. He soooo would like to spend some time with you, because you're soooo cool. He sooooo would like to spend the night with you. Xelsior should have suspected something, as i was so tired I could hardly stand on my paws. Legs. Whatever. Anyway gotta run because I'm falling asleep on this computer as I write. So, see you all soon, xoxoxo, and AAAAA-OOOOOO-zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

X - O - shion (exhaustion but I'm too tired to spell)

Melba pulled her sweetest face trick on me last night, and I was stupid enough to fall for it.
- Listen, Chimp-ion, Jack would loooove to sleep with you tonight... He thinks you're soooo cool.... I'd miss him, but just for a couple of nights, OK?
So Lil Jack came and we slept together. Let me rephrase this: he slept, I didn't. For a start, he couldn't go to sleep. He was sucking his little thumb, schluk schluk schluk schluk. Then he'd take his thumb out and tell me how much he misses him Mom. Yeah, well I've been there, I know what it's like. OK, I wasn't quite as small as Lil Jack, but still. I'd hug him, and cuddle him to quiet him down. Finally he felt asleep. I got ready to sleep, but five minutes later, I had his foot on my nose. Then he rolled over and his stomach was over my mouth. I pushed him off as gently as I could. He woke up and started crying. Stellar immediately starts yelling at me:
- Can't you comfort the poor thing?
Sigh. So I spent another half hour rocking him. Lil Jack is back to sleep. And he rolled all over me the whole night. I didn't want to push him off, as Melba and the others had been really aggravated. Today I'm sleep walking. Melba's giggling in corners. I'll get her for that. So is Stellar. Either I get Xelsior to take Lil Jack with him tonight, or I need to find another solution. More later. Aaaah Ooooooh (tired aaaaah, tired oooooh)

By the way, the image above is me exhausted. I made it on the computer. I know, it looks more like a human, Stellar already told me, but what can a chimp do, it's a program created by humans!